family reunion

I just witnessed a family reunion at the local shopping complex. An older mzungu, possibly from the UK somewhere, and his Kenyan girl friend coming home for the fist time in 5 years. They have a beautiful baby girl who keeps running around and she’s cute as hell. They proceeded to pray, take photos, and talk about their lives. This small display of affection really lifted my spirits today. Lately I’ve really wanted to come home. I dream about being home with my friends and family and I wake up and am upset that I’m still here. Being called out for being an mzungu is really starting to get to me. I feel alone a lot here. Like I’m the only one doing what I’m doing and experience what I am. Some times I just wish I were invisible. Other times, I wish I were at home driving my car through the countryside, with the music blaring. I miss my favorite foods, my bed, my bathroom, my mommy, my friends….I just want to be at home. And then I see something as wonderful as a family reunion, and I realize my feelings, while not insignificant, are not the end of the world. I’m truly learning and experiencing here. Though I’ll be glad to go home when the time comes, I refuse to let myself wallow in pity. Buck up and take it. This is life and it’s staring you right in the face.